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10 Georgia Tech Jokes

WRECK TECH!!!!

GLORY, GLORY TO OLE GEORGIA
AND TO HELL WITH Georgia Tech!!!

To celebrate one of the South''s most bitter rivalries, here are ten jokes that you can bring with you to tailgating!

10) Rumor has it that after one bitter game between Georgia and Tech during which Tech was wrecked as usual, the frustrated engineers started throwing dynamite at the Georgia students. This made the Georgia students so mad, they began lighting the sticks and throwing them back.

9) An explosion in the chemistry building wiped out half the Tech campus last year. Total damage was estimated at $13.69.

8) Tech boys won''t play hide and seek. If they disappeared, nobody would go look for them.

7) The Georgia Tech sophomore walked into an Atlanta carpentry shop. "Say," he motioned to the owner, "I''ve got some specifications for a special job. Can your shop build it for me?" The carpenter glanced at the plans, shrugged, and said, "Yeah, but what is it?" The student explained: "It''s a wooden box two inches square by 50 feet long." The owner thought for a second and said, "Well, we can build it, but I''m curious about what you''re going to do with it." The student responded, "My neighbor dropped out of school a week ago and has gone back home to New Jersey. He left his garden hose, though, and asked me to ship it to him."

6) Said the man to the rental agent, "I like this apartment, except for one thing - what''s that stain on the ceiling?" The agent replied, "Well, there was a Tech student that used to live here, and he was always fooling around with funny chemicals." Nodding his head, the prospective renter said, "I see. What kind of chemical made the stain?" Replied the agent: "None. That there''s the student."

5) An athlete from Georgia Tech actually won a gold medal in the recent Olympic games. He was so proud, he took it home and had it bronzed.

4) "Gee, you smell good," said the coed. "What have you got on?"
"Clean socks," said the Tech man.

3) Two guys were walking down the street and one says, "Hey, I just heard a great Georgia Tech joke."
"Hold on," says the other fellow, "I went to Georgia Tech."
"Oh. Well, in that case, I''ll tell it very slowly."

2) A northern industrialist was transferred to Athens just at the end of the football season. Being an avid football fan, the newcomer tried desperately for days to buy a ticket to the "game of the year" - Georgia vs. Tech. Finally, he was forced to pay a scalper $200 for a 40 yard line ticket. Came the day of the game, and he found himself sitting next to a sweet little old lady. He noticed that the seat next to her was empty and remained that way during the entire first half. At halftime, he could contain himself no longer. "Pardon me, m''am," he gestured, "but do you know whose vacant seat that is?" Said she, "Oh, that was my late husband''s." A little way into the third quarter, the industrialist began thinking, "I had to pay $200 for a ticket, and here''s a vacant seat just going to waste!" Turning to the lady and waving at the packed stadium, he demanded, "Why in heaven''s name didn''t you give the ticket to one of your friends? Don''t you know this is the game of the year?" The lady shook her head sadly. "Well, I tried to, but they decided to go to the funeral instead."

1) King George and King Arthur had been battling back and forth for many years, with neither gaining much ground against the other. Finally, George called forth his wizard. "Find me an ultimate weapon," he ordered. Shortly, the wizard produced a torture rack that would stretch 100 men. "That''ll terrify them," he said. George studied the plans for a few minutes, then proclaimed, "Yeah, it''s a good idea, alright, but how am I gonna move that big machine up to the front lines?" The wizard answered, "I''ve thought of that too. Send to India and get a big elephant." George pondered some more, and then said, "Yeah, but we need someone that can coordinate the elephant and the rack." Said the wizard, "That''s easy. We''ll hire an engineer. He''ll figure out a way to put the rack on the elephant''s back."
A few weeks later, one of King Arthur''s sentries spied a big cloud of dust on the horizon. Hurriedly, he called Arthur. The good King came to the outpost and threw his spyglass to his eye. "I can''t make it out!" he said. "Get me the wizard!" The wizard came. "What is that coming yonder?" the king asked. "Let me see," said the wizard, grabbing the spyglass. After studying the situation for a few minutes, he turned to the King. "It looks to me like a ramblin'' rack from George''s attack and an elephant engineer."

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Credits and Disclaimers: This page is not associated with the University of Georgia and does not represent the views held by UGA. All Georgia logos are © and ® of the University of Georgia. Other logos are also © and ® of those schools. References to any school are parodies. No harm, disrespect, infringement, or nuclear war is intended. If you are still offended after reading this disclaimer, then you need to take a valium. :-)

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